Almost the End

Soooo...as of yesterday I have only two weeks left here in Nicaragua. I'm soooo excited....but also starting to feel the sadness of leaving. Right now all I can see is the fact that I'll be getting to go home to my family...Jon....and friends....and celebrate the holidays.....I'll get to see my brother and sister-in-law from Oregon....and have a month to be with the ones I love...catch up with friends...enjoy the season.......but I know that when the day comes to leave the reality will hit me....I'll be leaving this home I've had for three and a half months.....these people who have opened their home to me...have loved me like their own.....this country I have learned about....the people with endless hope...always wishing for that light at the end of the tunnel...all the while stuck in a terrible cycle of brokenness and corruption. I will definitely be leaving a piece of my heart here in Nicaragua.......It will be interesting to see what hits me the most once I get back home....what will I miss....what will I be glad is gone......how is my life going to change because of this......I'm still searching for the answer to that question I asked a while ago....What now?.......

There isn't too much really going on here right now. This week will start the last week of classes. I have a Spanish paper due on Wednesday....another due on Thursday....a Catholic celebration this weekend...and then a paper and presentation due next week Wednesday. Lovely end of the semester activities lol.....I am dreading this Spanish paper so much....it's supposed to be eight pages....Leah, Sonya, and I don't know if we can do it. They gave us two weeks to do it...and about a three weeks notice....it started out as an 80 page paper...thank heavens we talked them down...80 pages in three weeks...I think not......anywho.....we'll see how that goes. I'm going to be writing about how Nicaraguans use songs to help preserve/maintain their culture, history, and everyday lives. They have such a way with words. My favorite song is called "Dale Una Luz". If you know Spanish you should look up the lyrics...they are beautiful.....Others are "Somos hijos del Maiz", "Maldicion de Malinche", and "Soy de un pueblo Sencillo". Check them out if you're interested :-D The story behind Malinche is also very interesting. Malinche was a name given to one of twenty women offered to Cortes when he came to the Americas. She was his mistress, his lover. She helped him translate and negotiate. There are mixed feelings about her.

Well, this paper isn't going to write itself *sigh*....I wish.....oh well...here goes! Catch you all later!

<3 Sarah

Last excursion...come and gone

This past weekend I had the lovely experience of getting to visit Costa Rica!! It was amazing!! (or as Leah likes to say A-Maaazing! hahaha). I could have stayed there for the rest of my semester...I wouldn't have minded. The days got nice and warm and sunny and then the nights got cold enough to snuggle under blankets. I loved it! We got to be tourists for one morning and go around to see some cathedrals (pics up on facebook) and visit this beautiful lookout point! Pictures don't do it justice. I could have stayed at that park all day and continually had my breath taken away by the view......anyways...
I got several people off my gift list...that was nice :D The girls (Leah and Sonya) and I..along with Matt....had fun going out at night after dinner....shopped...walked the streets...enjoyed the night life (that doesn't exist in Leon).....We had freedom once again...though we had to be back by 8 30...*sigh* oh well...better safe than sorry...
While in Costa Rica we got to visit this neighborhood where all the Nicaraguan immigrants live...they come to Costa Rica looking for a better life..a way to make money to send back to their families...it is VERY similar to Mexicans in the States...what poor conditions though....they actually have boundaries to their neighborhood...and there is hardly any mixing....there is like 5 families to one house...each gets a room....yes just a room.....to go to school the kids have to buy not only books and uniforms...but they are asked to bring chalk..toilet paper...copier paper...floor wax...everything....and if they don't bring these things they get looked down on and discriminated......so kids would rather just not go to school at all instead of showing up without these objects......most of them can't afford health care either.......the Costa Rican government has even stopped supporting non residence who have serious illness or disease...several years ago any seriously sick Nicaraguan could get support...but that was taken away from them.......we got to talk to some of the families....they had all been there for 10...15....20 years...all of them still scraping by...and most of them still holding on to hope that they would be able to go back....it left me quite pensive and quiet for the rest of the afternoon.....
I haven't been able to decide which country I would prefer to live in if I ever came back...Nicaragua or Costa Rica....I love the climate in Costa Rica and it unlike Nicaragua has a slight taste of the development of the States......you can feel both cultures while you are there...the evident Latin American culture and the newly emerging more developed North American culture.....it felt weird being able to feel both cultures pushing at each other and showing themselves in one place...and then on the other hand...Nicaraguan people are more friendly...more warm and welcoming.......Costa Rica is a very touristy place though...it is the most touristic of all the Central American countries.....Nicaragua is still underdeveloped and suppressed under their government......anyways....I loved the experience...loved the opportunity to get to compare yet another Central American country....see yet another perspective.....it was only four days but it was a fun filled and busy four days.....oooh I didn't even talk about getting INTO Costa Rica....the border is so weird here....first we have to EXIT Nicaragua...then we had to drive to the other side of the building and ENTER Costa Rica.....and then we leaving we had to do the same thing...exit Costa Rica and enter Nicaragua....weird.....the first time it took us TWO hours....the second time it was just over an hour.....the border was an experience in and of itself :-) But we realized as a group that we have such a privilege being who we are....all we need is one document to get across borders....they barely check our papers and barely check our luggage...here we were jumping between Costa Rica and Nicaragua in four days...and we had just talked to people waiting 10...15...20 years to return home.....the freedom we have because of where we were born and the life we were born into......it's a little humbling....no?

All in all it was a great experience! I put pics up on facebook! You should check them out :-D
I hope that life is finding you all well....enjoy the snow :-p......I know I'll be suffering once I get home.......enjoy the holiday spirits as they come upon us!!! Catch you all later!!

<3>

Food for thought

11-12-08

Today we had class in Managua because Monday had been declared a holiday by the president. I really enjoyed class today. The second part of it we had Carl and I can’t remember his name, come and talk to us about gangs and the work they have been doing with them. It blew my mind what these guys do….the situations they put their lives in everyday. They showed us at movie that was made by a student from Trinity while he was here for a semester. This student wanted to know the truth…he wanted to know why these people did what they do…..it was a very touching movie……and then Carl followed it up with some slideshows and stories of his own….I couldn’t believe what I was hearing….A lot of guys in this one gang really didn’t want to be trouble…they didn’t want to be looked at as robbers and theives and trouble makers…..but that was the stereotype they had to live with…..because they were in a gang that is how people looked at them….these guys wanted to change, wanted people to look at them as they would any other “normal” human being…..but they couldn’t escape their lable….but Carl and this other guy….they reach out to these gang members….they believe in them…they support them….they befriend them and treat them like normal beings….and it works! Several of the guys have already given their lives to Christ….and the community where these two work has really begun to change….just because these misplaced youth were given a chance….someone believe in them……I can’t image what it would be like to be able to touch someones life like these guys do everyday…..Carl was tearing up as he told us about it and I was tearing up too……just the hope….the light that is visible in these guys….these “trouble youth” in a gang…out to shoot and kill people while high on drugs. Yes the gang admitted doing stupid things like that….and they admitted being high on drugs while they did it and hardly remembering anything…..but so many of them wanted to change…..so many of them wanted to be seen differently….but it was and is so hard to change a stereotype…..if people are going to expect it from them…then why not just do it anyway?…..

Carl had this one picture that really hit me….like he mentioned it hit him too…..all these guys were around him wanting to see the pics he had on his camera of the group…when all of a sudden Carl looked out and saw all these eyes looking at him….eager faces…faces of hope……he turned the camera around and took the photo of all these eyes and faces…..it’s quite some photo…..to look into the eyes of these young men…to see hope…to see a future….to see everything they have been through….it’s written on their faces….you can see it in their eyes…..they have such a story…….when people think about gangs they think of trouble…of drugs….of killers….etc……yes there is this stereotype for a reason…..but when these guys look at a gang they see acceptance…they see family…they see people who got their back…people who won’t let them down…people who will help support them in times of trouble…people who will lend a hand without thinking twice…..these guys find what they can’t find in their own families…in their own homes….in their own communities….and though there are many bad gangs out there…what about the ones like this one…with guys who want to change but can’t get out of their stereotype? Guys who want to change but no one will believe in them or support them? Don’t they all deserve a chance?

I like what Carl said….in telling us about his mission he told us how they don’t go to the people already in churches…they don’t go to kids in stable homes…..they go to the rejected….the ignored…the forgotten….the ones that are too dirty and too broken for anyone else to help them…..the people that society looks at and says “ew stay away from them”…these guys go to them with arms wide open…full of love and acceptance….and give them a chance…Carl’s story really touched my heart…my soul….I was silent most of the day lost in thought…taking everything he said in….what it would be like to touch a life like that….to finally see the product of your labor….to see how you have changed a life for the better…..yes these guys put themselves into the middle of gangs…not really knowing what is going to happen day to day…..but they have God…they have faith…they have love…and they believe in giving everyone a chance….WOW….this world has so much to learn.

The end is in sight!

Hey everyone!
I don't know who follows this or what not but anyways...here's for anyone who does check it :-D

This past week has been a rough one...but I'll get to that in a minute....First let me tell you about my two weeks in Managua....they were GREAT! Leah, Sonya, and I spent two weeks doing our ESL (English as a second language...or here English as a foreign language) practicum. We spent four days of the week in classrooms of varying ages. Though I must say that my classes were a lot more hectic than a lot of classes in the states, I really enjoyed the experience! In fact so much so that Wednesdays when we don't have classes here in Leon, Leah and I go back to Managua to visit our classrooms :-)
Us three girls lived in this house called Quinta Shalom. It's sorta like a hostel but more like a guest house. We all shared a room....it was like a girls slumber party EVERY night lol.....we had some great convos...but I won't go there hahahaha! And the weather is so much better in Managua! It's a lot cooler. We enjoyed our new found freedom (after being away at college it is a little hard to be living with host families and having to answer to people again)....and I think we made more friends in those two weeks than in all of our time here in Leon....We wanted to stay sooo bad! But alas...we had to come back to life.....and once again the classes and daily answering to our families started over.

So now to this week. Monday morning I woke up with a pretty bad stomach ache...I thought it was just something wrong I had eaten the day before....but it lasted way longer than that. I was down flat in bed for two days....nauseous...dizzy and unable to eat.....I didn't sleep well and couldn't find a way to lay that didn't bother my stomach....it was pretty rough....and it made me miss home even more.....nothing like Mom when you're feeling sick...and my host mom here just doesn't cut it....as much as I love her.......

The count is down to one month and 8 days!!! WOOOHOOO.....I think everyday I get a little more homesick...I love it here but I'm just ready to be back...I miss my family and Jon so much...My family here loves me dearly but I miss being surrounded by the family and friends back home who love me just as I am.....I'm not a connection for them...they aren't with me because I can offer them anything....They're with me just because I'm me.....back home I don't get jeered at on the street...I don't get whistled at or called like a dog.....and I don't stick out like a sore thumb.....I know that is part of the culture here and it comes with the territory...but after a while it really builds up and you wish you could just be looked at for the person you are....

*sigh* anyways.....The week is almost over and boy am I ready for it to be.....next week comes Costa Rica and I'm soooooo excited!!! I'll get to be there Thurs-Sun.....that shall be fun.......I'll write more on that after I get back....we're going in order to experience/see how immigration works between the two countries and observe the relationship between people in Costa Rica and people in Nicaragua.

Well...I told my host mom that I'd be back around 6 30-7 so I guess I should get going...I'm pretty tired anyway....that illness really sucked my engery...plus I woke up early today to go to Managua and visit my classes :-D....

I hope that life is finding you all well! I miss you dearly and am counting down the days until I return home! LOVE YOU!!!

<3 Sarah